Personal Rule of Prayer
Written by Raouf Ibrahim
A spiritual and instructional guide to individual prayer.
Raouf Ibrahim (Raouf2430) is a servant and youth counsellor at St. Demiana Church, Solana Beach, California.
Raouf Ibrahim (Raouf2430) is a servant and youth counsellor at St. Demiana Church, Solana Beach, California.
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Introduction
What is prayer? What is its essence? How can we learn to pray? What does the spirit of the Christian experience as he prays in humility of heart? All of these questions should occupy our minds and hearts as believers, for in prayer man converses with God, he enters, through grace, into communion with Him, and lives in Him. The Holy Fathers and saints of the church, based on their grace-filled experiences of practicing prayer, give answers to all of these questions.
What is Prayer?
Prayer is the raising of the mind and heart to God in praise and thanksgiving to Him and in supplication for the good things that we need, both spiritual and physical. The essence of prayer, therefore, is the spiritual lifting of the heart (i.e. the complete inner man), towards God. External prayer, whether at home or in church, is only prayer's verbal expression and shape; the essence of prayer is within a man's mind and heart.
The Need for Prayer
Why is it necessary to pray at home, and to attend divine services at church? The answer is simple. For the same reason that food and drink are essential to our physical health and well being, likewise, prayer is essential for the life of the soul.
The Fathers and saints of the church tell us that without prayer, regardless of how high our morality, regardless of much we serve the Church and each other, regardless of any other virtue we might attain, we cannot know God and live spiritually
The Fathers and saints of the church tell us that without prayer, regardless of how high our morality, regardless of much we serve the Church and each other, regardless of any other virtue we might attain, we cannot know God and live spiritually
The Two Kinds of Prayer
In general, we can say that there are two kinds of prayer; the Corporate prayer, which we also call the liturgical prayers of the church (liturgy means "public work"), and the Personal prayer, which each Christian makes alone.
Regarding the first, the Lord said, "For where two or three are gathered together in my name, I am there in the midst of them." (Matt. 18:20) Regarding the latter, Christ also says, "But you, when you pray, go into your room, and when you have shut your door, pray to your Father who is in the secret place." (Matt. 6:6) These two are in no way contradictory to each other, nor can one ever take the place of the other.
The Fathers teach us that the quality of one has a direct affect on the quality of the other. One who attends services frequently but neglects personal prayer is not experiencing the true prayer of the saints, and likewise, the one who only prays alone believing he is not in need of the liturgical prayers of the church is also not experiencing the fullness of prayer.
The elements of prayer that are expressed in both the corporate and personal prayers of the church are:
Thanksgiving – when we give thanks to God for our life, for bringing us from non-existence into being, for the world that He has made, "for every condition, concerning every condition, and in every condition" (the liturgy of St. Basil).
Contrition or Repentance – the prayer in which we recognize our sinfulness before God. "A broken and humbled heart God shall not despise" (Psalm 50).
Intercession or Petition – the prayer of asking God for something, whether it be for our salvation or the needs of someone else.
Adoration – is considered to be the highest kind of prayer where we worship and praise God for who He is. "We give thanks to you for Your great glory" (The Gloria from Matins and the 1st Hour).
Regarding the first, the Lord said, "For where two or three are gathered together in my name, I am there in the midst of them." (Matt. 18:20) Regarding the latter, Christ also says, "But you, when you pray, go into your room, and when you have shut your door, pray to your Father who is in the secret place." (Matt. 6:6) These two are in no way contradictory to each other, nor can one ever take the place of the other.
The Fathers teach us that the quality of one has a direct affect on the quality of the other. One who attends services frequently but neglects personal prayer is not experiencing the true prayer of the saints, and likewise, the one who only prays alone believing he is not in need of the liturgical prayers of the church is also not experiencing the fullness of prayer.
The elements of prayer that are expressed in both the corporate and personal prayers of the church are:
Thanksgiving – when we give thanks to God for our life, for bringing us from non-existence into being, for the world that He has made, "for every condition, concerning every condition, and in every condition" (the liturgy of St. Basil).
Contrition or Repentance – the prayer in which we recognize our sinfulness before God. "A broken and humbled heart God shall not despise" (Psalm 50).
Intercession or Petition – the prayer of asking God for something, whether it be for our salvation or the needs of someone else.
Adoration – is considered to be the highest kind of prayer where we worship and praise God for who He is. "We give thanks to you for Your great glory" (The Gloria from Matins and the 1st Hour).
How to Pray
Putting aside discussion of the liturgical prayers of the church for another, let us turn our attention to our personal prayers. How do we pray when we are not in Church? Is there a correct way to pray as Orthodox Christians? Are there specific levels of prayer and if so, how do I know where I should start?
The answers to the above questions are found in what we call "A Personal Rule of Prayer". Simply stated, a prayer rule is an established set of prayers that are consistently recited on a daily basis. The word "rule" comes from the Latin "regula" (where we get the word "regular") As the Lord had a routine of spending many hours a day in prayer to His Father, so we also, if we are to be in communion with the Lord, must practice prayer regularly (daily).
St. Theophan the Recluse writes:
It would seem that nothing could be more simple and natural for us than prayer in which the heart is turned towards God. Yet this is not always present in prayer, nor in everyone. It must be awakened, then strengthened; one must be educated even to achieve a spirit of prayer. The first step in this direction is to say prayers and to listen to prayers. If you say your prayers as you should, then you will inevitably awaken in yourself a rising up of the heart toward God – and this is the way to enter into the spirit of prayer.
Our prayer books contain the prayers of the holy fathers. As they were themselves filled with the spirit of prayer, they put words to what the spirit revealed to them, and then they passed it on to us. Thus a great power of prayer moves in their every prayer. By the law of reciprocal action, those who enter energetically and attentively into these prayers will taste the power of the original prayer to the extent that their spirit comes close to the spirit it contains.
The church, in her wisdom, as handed down to us the perfect prayers. These prayers are contained in the Agpeya, or the Book of Hours. If we attempt to pray on our own, our prayers will be completely guided by our state of emotions at the time. In doing this, we may praise God, and neglect to offer prayers of thanksgiving, intercession for others, and repentance. Or we may pray a prayer of intercession on behalf of a loved one and neglect to thank God for allowing us to pass this day in peace. Or even worse, we may not pray at all! The Agpeya, therefore, ensures not only that we include all elements of prayer when we lift our hearts to God, but also in words that have been prayed by saints before us who are now members in the church triumphant, and with our brothers and sisters in the church militant. Therefore, the whole Body of Christ is united in prayer with the Lord.
Let us briefly examine, following the pattern in the Agpeya, how it includes all the elements of prayer that we discussed above:
The Thanksgiving Prayer – In this one prayer, we thank God for His beneficence, mercy, protection, help, guardianship, acceptance of us as sinners, support. We thank Him for "bringing us to this hour". In short, we thank Him "for every condition, concerning every condition, and in every condition." This prayer also includes petitions for our peace, protection from envy, temptation, all the works of the Devil, our enemies, and to provide us with all "things which are good and profitable."
Psalm 50 – A prayer of repentance in which we acknowledge our sins from the time of our birth – "against You only I have sinned" – and our sorrow – "for I am conscious of my iniquity and my sin is at all times before me". It asks for forgiveness – "Turn away Your face from my sins, and blot out all my iniquities" - and also expresses hope in God’s healing power – "You shall wash me and I shall be made whiter than snow". It petitions God for purity – "Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit in my inward parts" – and the joy of salvation – "Give me the joy of Your salvation".
The Selection of the Psalms – A dimension to the Psalter that makes it considered to be the perfect collection of prayers is that the Psalms contain and express every human experience and emotion imaginable. Whether it is faith, trust, hope, glorification and adoration of God, repentance, acclamation, sorrow, desire (hunger and thirst for God), and despair is all to be found there. The Psalms contain the whole experience of God’s revelation to human beings as well as the whole human response in all its variations.
The Gospel Reading – The Scriptures, i.e. the Word of God, are the Heavenly food in which we encounter God. This encounter, if approached properly, becomes a perfect prayer in which God speaks to us and we respond.
The Litanies, the 41 Kyrie Eleisons, the "Holy, Holy, Holy, Lord of Sabaouth..", the Lord’s Prayer, the Absolution, and the Conclusion of Every Hour (Have mercy on us, Oh God..) – These prayers are filled with the adoration of God, our petitions for Him and for the intercessions of His mother, the angels, and the saints, and expressions of repentance and thanksgiving. We also pray for others; the reposed and the living.
Commemorating the Life of Our Lord and His Works of Salvation Accomplished for us – 1st Hour (Resurrection), 3rd Hour (Pentecost), 6th Hour (Crucifixion), 9th Hour (Death of Our Lord and testimony of the thief at His right hand), 11th Hour (Removal of the Precious Body of Christ from the Cross and its Anointing), 12th Hour (Laying down of Christ’s Body in the grave – and recalling that our sleep is a temporary death).
The fathers and saints of the church teach us that the key to growing in our prayer life is constancy. That is, the prayer rule must be kept every day (preferably morning and evening) no matter what. This, of course, is very difficult as many problems will arise. The saints give us some suggestions to be more successful in our prayer rule.
The answers to the above questions are found in what we call "A Personal Rule of Prayer". Simply stated, a prayer rule is an established set of prayers that are consistently recited on a daily basis. The word "rule" comes from the Latin "regula" (where we get the word "regular") As the Lord had a routine of spending many hours a day in prayer to His Father, so we also, if we are to be in communion with the Lord, must practice prayer regularly (daily).
St. Theophan the Recluse writes:
It would seem that nothing could be more simple and natural for us than prayer in which the heart is turned towards God. Yet this is not always present in prayer, nor in everyone. It must be awakened, then strengthened; one must be educated even to achieve a spirit of prayer. The first step in this direction is to say prayers and to listen to prayers. If you say your prayers as you should, then you will inevitably awaken in yourself a rising up of the heart toward God – and this is the way to enter into the spirit of prayer.
Our prayer books contain the prayers of the holy fathers. As they were themselves filled with the spirit of prayer, they put words to what the spirit revealed to them, and then they passed it on to us. Thus a great power of prayer moves in their every prayer. By the law of reciprocal action, those who enter energetically and attentively into these prayers will taste the power of the original prayer to the extent that their spirit comes close to the spirit it contains.
The church, in her wisdom, as handed down to us the perfect prayers. These prayers are contained in the Agpeya, or the Book of Hours. If we attempt to pray on our own, our prayers will be completely guided by our state of emotions at the time. In doing this, we may praise God, and neglect to offer prayers of thanksgiving, intercession for others, and repentance. Or we may pray a prayer of intercession on behalf of a loved one and neglect to thank God for allowing us to pass this day in peace. Or even worse, we may not pray at all! The Agpeya, therefore, ensures not only that we include all elements of prayer when we lift our hearts to God, but also in words that have been prayed by saints before us who are now members in the church triumphant, and with our brothers and sisters in the church militant. Therefore, the whole Body of Christ is united in prayer with the Lord.
Let us briefly examine, following the pattern in the Agpeya, how it includes all the elements of prayer that we discussed above:
The Thanksgiving Prayer – In this one prayer, we thank God for His beneficence, mercy, protection, help, guardianship, acceptance of us as sinners, support. We thank Him for "bringing us to this hour". In short, we thank Him "for every condition, concerning every condition, and in every condition." This prayer also includes petitions for our peace, protection from envy, temptation, all the works of the Devil, our enemies, and to provide us with all "things which are good and profitable."
Psalm 50 – A prayer of repentance in which we acknowledge our sins from the time of our birth – "against You only I have sinned" – and our sorrow – "for I am conscious of my iniquity and my sin is at all times before me". It asks for forgiveness – "Turn away Your face from my sins, and blot out all my iniquities" - and also expresses hope in God’s healing power – "You shall wash me and I shall be made whiter than snow". It petitions God for purity – "Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit in my inward parts" – and the joy of salvation – "Give me the joy of Your salvation".
The Selection of the Psalms – A dimension to the Psalter that makes it considered to be the perfect collection of prayers is that the Psalms contain and express every human experience and emotion imaginable. Whether it is faith, trust, hope, glorification and adoration of God, repentance, acclamation, sorrow, desire (hunger and thirst for God), and despair is all to be found there. The Psalms contain the whole experience of God’s revelation to human beings as well as the whole human response in all its variations.
The Gospel Reading – The Scriptures, i.e. the Word of God, are the Heavenly food in which we encounter God. This encounter, if approached properly, becomes a perfect prayer in which God speaks to us and we respond.
The Litanies, the 41 Kyrie Eleisons, the "Holy, Holy, Holy, Lord of Sabaouth..", the Lord’s Prayer, the Absolution, and the Conclusion of Every Hour (Have mercy on us, Oh God..) – These prayers are filled with the adoration of God, our petitions for Him and for the intercessions of His mother, the angels, and the saints, and expressions of repentance and thanksgiving. We also pray for others; the reposed and the living.
Commemorating the Life of Our Lord and His Works of Salvation Accomplished for us – 1st Hour (Resurrection), 3rd Hour (Pentecost), 6th Hour (Crucifixion), 9th Hour (Death of Our Lord and testimony of the thief at His right hand), 11th Hour (Removal of the Precious Body of Christ from the Cross and its Anointing), 12th Hour (Laying down of Christ’s Body in the grave – and recalling that our sleep is a temporary death).
The fathers and saints of the church teach us that the key to growing in our prayer life is constancy. That is, the prayer rule must be kept every day (preferably morning and evening) no matter what. This, of course, is very difficult as many problems will arise. The saints give us some suggestions to be more successful in our prayer rule.
A Place and Time for Prayer
Every Orthodox home should have a dedicated place for personal and family prayers. This place is often called the Icon Corner. The Icon Corner should include icons of the Lord and the Mother of God, as well as saints and angels that you have a spiritual bond with. Also helpful is a wall shelf just below the icons where one can place prayer books, vigil lamps, holy oil, holy water, etc…. This creates an atmosphere for worship, similar to that of the church. Just as it is important to have the proper atmosphere if one is studying for an exam, it is likewise important to have a place that is suitable and dedicated to prayer.
It is also helpful to have set times for your prayer rule. This will help you in keeping it at all times. For example, after you awaken in the morning and get dressed and just before you sleep.
It is also helpful to have set times for your prayer rule. This will help you in keeping it at all times. For example, after you awaken in the morning and get dressed and just before you sleep.
Read the Prayers
Try to spend some time reading the prayers you will use during free time. St. Theophan says, Make sure you understand and feel every word so that you know beforehand what should be in your heart at each and every word. It is even better to learn all the prayers by heart. If you work in this way, it will be easier for you to understand and to feel when you are saying the prayers.
Prepare for Prayer
St. Theophan says, Although prayer is a habitual action for us, it needs preparation. For anyone who knows how to read and write, what is more usual than reading and writing? Yet if we sit down to read and write we do not do so suddenly, we first get ourselves into the mood for what we are going to do. This kind of preparation is all the more necessary before we start to pray, particularly if our occupation immediately beforehand was very different from prayer.
So, morning or evening, immediately before you begin to repeat your prayers, stand awhile, sit for awhile, or walk a little and try to steady your mind and turn it away from all worldly activities and objects. After this, think who He is to whom you turn in prayer, then recollect who you are; who it is who is about to start this invocation to Him in prayer. Do this in such a way as to awake in your heart a feeling of humility and reverent awe that your are standing in the presence of God. It is the beginning of prayer, and a good beginning is half the complete task.
So, morning or evening, immediately before you begin to repeat your prayers, stand awhile, sit for awhile, or walk a little and try to steady your mind and turn it away from all worldly activities and objects. After this, think who He is to whom you turn in prayer, then recollect who you are; who it is who is about to start this invocation to Him in prayer. Do this in such a way as to awake in your heart a feeling of humility and reverent awe that your are standing in the presence of God. It is the beginning of prayer, and a good beginning is half the complete task.
Force Yourself to Pray
One of the obstacles to being consistent in our prayer rule is laziness and procrastination. This is especially tempting when we do not feel the desire to pray. Regarding the this, the saints teach us that we must force ourselves to pray, much like we force ourselves to attend to any chore. The difference is, however, that when we force ourselves to pray, often times the desire is given to us again which was lacking to begin with.
St. Macarius the Great says, The man who desires to come to the Lord and to be found worthy of eternal life should force himself to every good work and to fulfilling all the commandments of the Lord because of sin that is present with him… One must force himself to prayer when he has not spiritual prayer; and thus God, beholding him thus striving and compelling himself by force, in spite of an unwilling heart, gives him the true prayer of the Spirit.
St. Macarius the Great says, The man who desires to come to the Lord and to be found worthy of eternal life should force himself to every good work and to fulfilling all the commandments of the Lord because of sin that is present with him… One must force himself to prayer when he has not spiritual prayer; and thus God, beholding him thus striving and compelling himself by force, in spite of an unwilling heart, gives him the true prayer of the Spirit.
Dealing with Wandering Thoughts
One of the greatest difficulties when we tread on the path of prayer is that of wandering thoughts. Like many other things, the solution is training. St. Theophan says, It is necessary to make the effort to concentrate the attention even though one knows in advance that the thoughts will wander. When the mind does wanders during prayer, recall it – and do so over and over again. If the mind wanders many times at the same place, repeat the section again and again until it is said entirely with feeling and understanding. Once you have overcome this difficulty, it may never repeat itself. If it does, it may not do so to the same extent.
If a Word in the Prayer Strongly Affects You
Sometimes it happens that some word or phrase in the prayers will strongly affect your soul, causing it to not continue speaking the prayers. The mind keeps going back to this word or phrase. In this case, St. Theophan says, Stop! Do not continue repeating the prayers, but stand with your attention on those words, feeling them. Feed the soul on them or on the thoughts that arise from them. Do not hurry to move on from this state, even if you have no time left; it is better to leave your rule of prayer unfinished than to destroy this state of mind. This will sanctify you and will perhaps last all day long…this kind of action of grace when you are saying prayers means that the spirit of prayer itself is beginning to penetrate into you.
Your Own Words During Prayer
At the end of your prayer rule, it is good to spend additional time saying your own prayers. You can use this time to ask for forgiveness for involuntary inattentiveness during prayer. Also, this is a good time to pray for others.
You can keep a peace of paper or index card with the names of those you wish to pray for in the following categories with prayers such as those below:
For the Christian living – "Grant, O Lord, health and salvation to Your servants…."
For the Christian reposed – "Grant, O Lord, repose with the Saints to Your servants…"
For the Catechumens – "Grant, O Lord, that Your holy will be done with your servants…"
For the Non-Christian living – "Grant, O Lord, that Your servants will be illumined with the light of the Orthodox faith, and numbered with Your one, Holy, Catholic, and Apostolic Church…"
For the Non-Christian reposed – "Grant, O Lord, if it be possible on the souls of Your departed servants (names), who have departed into eternal life in separation from Your Holy Orthodox Church"
You can keep a peace of paper or index card with the names of those you wish to pray for in the following categories with prayers such as those below:
For the Christian living – "Grant, O Lord, health and salvation to Your servants…."
For the Christian reposed – "Grant, O Lord, repose with the Saints to Your servants…"
For the Catechumens – "Grant, O Lord, that Your holy will be done with your servants…"
For the Non-Christian living – "Grant, O Lord, that Your servants will be illumined with the light of the Orthodox faith, and numbered with Your one, Holy, Catholic, and Apostolic Church…"
For the Non-Christian reposed – "Grant, O Lord, if it be possible on the souls of Your departed servants (names), who have departed into eternal life in separation from Your Holy Orthodox Church"
Unceasing Prayer
St. Paul commands us saying, Pray without ceasing (1 Thess. 5:17). The Orthodox Christian does not limit his prayers (i.e. the time that he lifts his mind and heart to God) to the Prayer Rule and liturgical prayers of the Church, but prays at all times according to his strength and God’s grace. The most useful tool for achieving this is to recite short prayers such as the Jesus Prayer ("Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner) or a verse from one of the Psalms ("Make haste, O God, to deliver me! Make haste to help me, O Lord" - Psalm 70).
The goal of unceasing prayer is to arouse a constant awareness of the presence of God. It creates a sure realization and recognition of God’s majesty and our dependence upon His grace. The Jesus Prayer can, of course, be incorporated into our daily rule.
The goal of unceasing prayer is to arouse a constant awareness of the presence of God. It creates a sure realization and recognition of God’s majesty and our dependence upon His grace. The Jesus Prayer can, of course, be incorporated into our daily rule.
Conclusion
St. Theophan says, The essence of prayer lies in lifting the mind and heart to God. Prayer rules are only aids to this end. We weak ones cannot do without them!
